Posted by Suzanne Lilly
This week I read an article Amy Copperman wrote for the online magazine Divine Caroline, called "The Perfect Man." In it, she lays out a grocery list of qualities The Perfect Man should have, according to recent research by Austin Reed. It’s even laid out in a handy format which you can print out and take with you to the grocery store. Or laundromat. Or wherever you might hope to meet this elusive man.
This led me to…
Click on the Austin Reed link, thinking I was going to see the details of a weak research study. Instead, I ended up on the Austin Reed menswear webpage. It’s full of suits the previously described Perfect Man would wear, modeled by similar Perfect Men.
Which led me to…
My own research project on Google to find out how many people use the search term “The Perfect Man,” as opposed to “The Perfect Woman” or “The Perfect Date.”
“The Perfect Man” beat out the other search terms by 16 to1. Stay with me, this story is going somewhere.
This led me to wonder…
Which search terms might beat out “The Perfect Man?” Perhaps “chocolate?” I added “chocolate” to the search. It beat “The Perfect Man,” 60 to 1. Yipes! Are more women searching for chocolate than are searching for men? Could that be a question for the Would You Rather game?
This offhand thought led me to…
Entering the search term “Audi,” because according to Ms. Copperman’s article, The Perfect Man drives an Audi.
Sure enough, “Audi” beat out “The Perfect Man” 80 to 1. Loosely translated, women are 80 times more interested in a man’s Audi, and 60 times more interested in how much chocolate it can hold in the trunk, than they are in the man himself.
I know, it's silly, right?
Advice to men, according to Ms. Copperman’s article, is that you can’t go wrong if you drive an Audi, dress in a sharp suit, drink beer, and enjoy watching soaps. Then I clicked on an article link in the Google search results.
Which led me to…
Isaiah Mustafa, the Old Spice Man. He rides a horse or drives a motorcycle in the commercials and doesn't drive an Audi. He doesn’t wear suits. I’m pretty sure he’s not drinking beer while he watches soaps. All that research was for naught, because we all know how Isaiah Mustafa made sales of Old Spice skyrocket.
Let’s face it, there is no Perfect Man, unless he’s Your Perfect Man, aka Mr. Right. He comes in all sizes, shapes, and sensibilities, no matter what the Austin Reed study says. There’s only one thing that’s almost certain to attract women.